Status Reports & Other Ramblings


2019 shipping rates plus a chicken mailing story

Back when I first started WS, in 2005, I sent most packages with a 63 cent stamp on them. 

SIXTY-THREE CENTS. 

(I also used to send my assistant to the post office IN PERSON to buy stamps, because printing postage at home wasn't really a thing then. One time she came back without any stamps because someone was trying to mail live chickens IN MANHATTAN and the line was ridiculous, but that's another story.)

Alas, those days are long over, and honestly, I probably should have raised my shipping rates quite some time ago, because I think the last time I adjusted them was, uh... 2010, maybe? Unless you count the time I temporarily lowered the free shipping threshold from $50 to $25, but I kept forgetting to put it back up to $50 because brain damage and OH LOOK A SQUIRREL and also that's kind of the opposite of adjusting to follow inflation USPS rate hikes.  

(I could've sworn it used to be $40 but my shipping page says it used to be $50 so maybe I raised it from $40 to $50 at some point? I DON'T KNOW I JUST WORK HERE.)

ANYWAY. New rates went into effect a few days ago, and it's all horrendously complicated and based on weight and zones and moon phases and numerology and stuff, and while I COULD switch to a $299/month (no I didn't misplace a decimal) plan that would calculate exact shipping rates, I'm going to opt for "charge everybody a flat rate of $3.50" because that's easy and doesn't penalize anyone for the fact that I live almost as far east as it's possible to get without being IN the Atlantic Ocean, which isn't a good idea this time of year.

(Also I am finally adjusting the free shipping threshold, but only up to $35 instead of $40 $50, and I'll plan to lower it back to $25 a few times a year during sales because I can.)

AND OKAY, FINE, THE CHICKEN MAILING STORY:

When I first started WS, I lived in Inwood, which is technically in Manhattan, for the definition of "my apartment was 13 blocks from the Bronx" but STILL, it was in Manhattan. And one day I asked my assistant to go to the nearby post office to buy stamps, and she was gone a very long time considering the fact that the post office was four blocks away, and then she came back and apologized for not being able to get stamps because someone was mailing live adult chickens and nobody working at the post office knew HOW to mail a live chicken and apparently there was a line out the door and chickens running around pecking at people while the chicken farmer kept saying "THEY WON'T HURT NOBODY" and if your order was inexplicably delayed for a day back in 2006 NOW YOU FINALLY KNOW WHY.

(Also I just looked up how to mail adult chickens and if you're interested you can find all the relevant details in USPS Publication 526.4, which is immediately followed by the rules for mailing live scorpions WHICH JUST SEEMS LIKE A REALLY REALLY BAD IDEA WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT.)

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Final 24 hours of the sale! (give or take an hour...)

We've now reached the part of the year-end clearance sale where I am VERY punchy from the combination of running my biggest sale of the year the same week my child isn't in school, culminating in a day when said child is hopped up on sugar and birthday sass. Which means... time for markdowns, obviously!

The sale runs through 11:59pm EASTERN time on December 31st, 2018. The coupon code you will need is BYE2018 and it takes 40% off whatever prices you see on the website.

Also, much as I hate to do it, it looks like I will be raising my shipping rates in 2019. I was able to eat the cost of the postage rate increases for the past few years, but I don't think I can do that with this next set of increases. I will still keep my rates as reasonable as possible and offer US free shipping on purchases of $35 or more (up from the current $25 minimum but still down from the original $40 minimum) and as always I'm happy to combine multiple orders into a single package whenever it's safely possible.

(So what I'm saying here is "go get yourself some shines now while you can still grab free shipping on $25+ orders, and hey, since everything is on sale, you might as well stock up! It's saving money, basically!" DID I MENTION THAT I AM PUNCHY?

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last-chance Instant Gratification session!

Okay, y'all, let's try this... Thursday and Friday are looking relatively not-chaotic (I probably just cursed myself) so I'm blocking them out to work on custom pieces, including any last-minute or spur-of-the-moment requests!

Here's how it works: if you can tell me what you want in one (short) paragraph, and it will cost $50 or less, and I have the materials on hand, I'll make it. Then I put up a reserved-for-you listing in the store, and if you like it you buy it and I'll send it to you. (If you don't like it, I'll toss it into regular inventory next week, no hard feelings. Sometimes I'm able to take a second try at a piece if I don't get it right the first time, but I make no promises because AHAHAHAHAHAJFKDLSDKFKS THIS YEAR I CAN'T EVEN.)

Comments on blog posts and the book of faces are NOT working reliably and I don't have time or energy to figure out why, so please EMAIL (kythryne@wyrdingstudios.com) or Facebook MESSAGE me (Wyrding Studios) or Twitter DM (@wyrdingstudios) your request - that way I can respond to you directly with your link in a semi-timely manner. I'll try to edit a running list of the requests into this post, too. 

Requests are open as of now and will stay that way until noon eastern time on Friday or whenever we hit 10 requests, whichever comes first. If we hit 10 and I manage to race through them, I'll re-open requests and/or tackle anything that's left in the queue. 

I will also have some mystery earring grab bags that will go up on the website tomorrow! And tonight around 5:45 there will be a Very Special Livestream on Facebook. I'm not going to put on actual pants, though, it's a pajama week over here.

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last-chance shiny shopping

(actual photo of me without coffee during the holiday shipping season)

Need a few last-minute-ish shiny presents? I've got you covered: buy anything in the ready-to-ship section or the clearance section, get an item from the clearance section for 50% off when you use coupon code GIFTMAS18 - and yes, that does mean you COULD theoretically buy something inexpensive from the ready-to-ship section and get something considerably more expensive from the clearance section for half-price, I just checked to see if it works and it does. JUST SAYIN'.

Also! Allow me to remind you of the existence of the $5 Surprise Earrings! I highly recommend keeping a bunch of these on hand for those "oh I didn't realize we were exchanging gifts uh HANG ON" moments. (Not that I've ever had one of those moments and hastily raided my own inventory, nope, NOT ME I don't know what you're talking about.) Or for those pesky little "darn it why I don't I have any blue earrings" moments, or just because it's Tuesday. I don't judge.

I still owe everybody and their cousin and their cousin's puppy an email because there was Drama last week. But I'm almost caught up on shipping and subscriptions and hopefully there will be a last-chance Instant Gratification session on, uh *consults calendar* Wednesday or Thursday? 

(actual photo of me on December 19th when someone asks if there's still time to order a Christmas present)

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holiday shipping deadlines, with bonus visual earworm

The winter holidays are fast approaching, and so are holiday shipping deadlines! Please keep the following dates in mind, because your friendly neighborhood wirebender can only work so many miracles in any given day:

  • if you would like your shinies to arrive before the last night of Hannukah (Sunday, December 9th), the order must be placed no later than this coming Monday, December 3rd. It is physically impossible for me to get things to you before the first night of Hanukkah unless you happen to live in New Hampshire or just really really like road trips and want to come pick them up between now and sundown on Tuesday.

  • If you would like your shinies to arrive before Christmas Eve (Monday, December 24th) the order must be placed no later than Saturday, December 15th. No exceptions; I am not a Time Lord. (Unless you want to pay $45 for overnight shipping, and yes, that is an exorbitant markup because I charge extra for things I don't want to do. Now you know.)
     
  • If you celebrate a different winter holiday that I'm not looking up right now because I have a migraine and looking things up on screens hurts, you should order at least one week in advance, and preferably more like 10 days. Also, Priority Mail is your friend if you need things fast.

  • If you somehow manage to forget about the existence of Christmas until December 19th, as someone inevitably does every single year (how? how is that possible? do you live under a rock??) your options are… uh... a gift certificate or a larger gift certificate! 
     
  • If you live outside the United States, AHAHAHAHA good luck. Maybe try sacrificing a goat to your local gods? Try a gift certificate, it’s much less messy and PETA probably won’t get mad at you unless they find out I’m not a vegetarian in which case… uh… you’re on your own here, actually.

(If you want a gift certificate, please email me and we'll figure out how to make it work. PayPal no longer offers gift certificates and Shopify charges a truly ridiculous amount of money for the privilege of having gift certificates, but I have some workarounds that are only moderately clunky and annoying.)

 I'm always happy to ship directly to the gift recipient and will even giftwrap it, although I'll warn you that my giftwrapping skills are... adequate at best? I mean, it's better than nothing, but there are no artisanal fir sprigs or miniature pinecones or whatever those red things are. Just sparkly paper that probably won't look like I made the 7-year-old do it for me.
In other news: I got over pneumonia! Yay! But then I promptly got a sinus infection! Very not yay! And my insurance is being all "WE DON'T THINK YOU ACTUALLY NEED THIS MEDICATION YOUR DOCTOR PRESCRIBED SO WE AREN'T GOING TO PAY FOR IT" so I kinda want to bite people today, or at least let Smol Panther bite them for me. Also, bonus migraine! Because incoming snowstorm + sinus aliens = I have been awake and irritable since 3:30 am! But it's fine! I don't need to work or anything! 
(NOVEMBER YOU ARE FIRED. DECEMBER, MAKE BETTER CHOICES.)
Seeing as how I'm not independently wealthy, though, I've been working on some Christmas-themed earrings today, and... well. The short person and I have been marathoning the Addams Family this week and Fioricet makes me punchy, what can I say? SORRY NOT SORRY. 
(They'll be on the website tomorrow. I hope.)
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